"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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