He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
