Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
