i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
