i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
