I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I'm way too hungover for life right now
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
