I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
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we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
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I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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