You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
