You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize