What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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