I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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