may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
