True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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