He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Randomize