; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
