I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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