i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
