On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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