no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
