life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
FUCK WHALES
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
