the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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