Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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