Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
