Non-Jews are for practice
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Sober January is a disaster.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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