I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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