so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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