even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Randomize
