Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Randomize
