I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize