overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
