OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
You smell like stripper and shame
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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