Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
