question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
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