There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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