I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize