i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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