Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize
