haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize