Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
