I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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