She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize
