they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
no, he came in my armpit
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
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