It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Randomize