You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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