It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize