So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
mondays should just be called national damage control day
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
