WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
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i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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