it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
So much Jack, so little girl.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Randomize
