WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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