I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
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