the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize